Snatch is one busy movie. You have six criminal organizations vying after a single priceless diamond, making threats, mistakes, and murders. It certainly fits the bill for a crime thriller; rigged boxing matches, heists, robberies, kidnapping, murder… and dogs. It’ll be much easier to understand just what kind of movie Snatch is if you hear a little bit about the web of events.
Turkish (Jason Statham) and Tommy (Stephen Graham) are two fellows in a great deal of trouble. They’re meant to rig a boxing match for a notorious crimelord called Brick Top, who’s known for murdering useless lackeys and feeding them to pigs. When they go to a “pikey” encampment in an attempt to buy a better trailer, Gorgeous George, their boxer, gets his face punched in by Mickey O’Niel (Brad Pitt). So, they hire Mickey to fight the rigged fight. Only, he takes his opponent out in one punch instead of going down in the fourth. Brick Top is not happy.
All the while, Franky Four-Fingers and his crew are busy stealing an 86-carat diamond from a jewelry store while disguised as rabbis. The heist is successful. Frankie contacts Doug the Head, a self-proclaimed Jewish man who’s known for moving gemstones. He tells his New Yorker friend Cousin Avi that Frankie’s got ice, and Avi wants to buy.
Frankie meets Boris the Blade, who convinces him to head to the boxing match and place a few bets. Boris knows that Frankie has a gambling problem, so he hires a few thugs to steal the diamond from him while he’s at the bookies. The thugs this time around are Sol and Vinnie, two pawn shop owners who have a lot of bad luck with crime. They manage to steal the diamond, but not before their getaway driver Tyrone shows his face to a camera.
Cousin Avi then wants to know where the hell Frankie’s gone off to, since nobody really knows that Boris shot him in the head and stole his briefcase. Since Doug the Head isn’t any help, Avi flies to London and employs the help of Bullet-Tooth Tony. Using one of his contacts, Tony finds out about the pawnbrokers and proceeds to hunt them down. Unfortunately, Brick Top already has his fingers in that pie.
Avi and Tony get to the diamond at Boris’s place first, though with Sol and Vinnie in tail. The former pair head to a pub to clean up, but not before Boris appears and ambushes Avi. Sol and Vinnie try to do some ambushing too, but their replica pistols don’t intimidate Tony. One clusterfuck with guns later, Sol and Vinnie make off with the diamond. Before they can get it to Brick Top, Tony hunts them down again.
Don’t ask how, but the diamond winds up in the belly of Vinnie’s dog, and in a panic, Avi accidentally shoots Tony. Crime is messy. That’s about all the plot you need to know in order to understand what Snatch is like; confusing.
So much as I enjoy the complexity and depth of the plot of this movie, it’s a little difficult to keep track of at times. Maybe more than a little difficult. You’ll meet a bunch of funky criminal characters, see most of them get their faces blown off, and probably have a laugh or two when Brad Pitt does his unintelligible pikey accent. Oh, and don’t feel bad if you don’t understand him. You’re not meant to. You are meant to watch this movie if you have a thing for black comedy laced crime thrillers, though, because this is a great one.
Joshua Tyler of CinemaBlend sees Snatch as a clusterfuck too, but finds that director Guy Ritchie drops the ball with his choice of dialogue. Also, the word “fuck” is used 163 times, so I suppose that accounts for the dialogue’s quality… Snatch is 104 minutes long, which means 1.5 “fucks” are said every minute. That’s quite a bit. But hey, there’s more to the review than profanity. Check it out: http://www.cinemablend.com/reviews/Snatch-95.html